Sven Co-op Map Reviews

       This map is a scrap, an experiment, a proof of concept. And boy howdy does it prove the concept, as long as that concept is 'make a model of the solar system'. Nothing much else in the map. SCMapDB page Author: Keen Date of release: 2007 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Keen's Solar System (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | May 3, 2026 | 2116 characters      We start looking at the map's title over a little eye-candy rotating sprite effect. We run down a ramp toward the sprite and fall through the ground into a black void where the only things we can anchor ourselves to are the rotating planets in a massive diorama of the solar system.      I can't overstate that this introduction gave me a rollercoasteresque sense of disorientation and excitement as I took in the next thing the map had to offer: a glut of fun information.      The void is a big black room containing a large diorama, at the center of ...

      This map is a scrap, an experiment, a proof of concept. And boy howdy does it prove the concept, as long as that concept is 'make a model of the solar system'. Nothing much else in the map. SCMapDB page Author: Keen Date of release: 2007 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Keen's Solar System (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | May 3, 2026 | 1763 characters      The map description says its a proof of concept and not really a playable experience. Well I decided to give it a whirl anyway with zero expectations and I was impressed.      Players start in a slanted room with an intangible floor at one end and players take fall damage when going to the next room. But that's a gameplay critique and this map is a proof of concept, so lets look at the main attraction. This map has a massive solar system revolving around a dark room, the planets are made of sprites and are two dimensional but it still looks really good. There is a larg...

        They say a picture is worth a thousand words. Look at the above picture. If the link isn't broken then you know what kind of map this is. SCMapDB page Author: Keen Date of release: 2008 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Horsecock 7 (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | May 2, 2026 | 2721 characters      Horsecock 7 is a nonsensical toy map where the toy is an enormous horse cock that you are ejaculated from and then try to land in one of many floating toilets while monsters and assassins in the enormously tall surrounding walls take pot shots at you. You simply line yourself up in base of the cock's urethra, shoot an adjacent brush (as instructed in the MOTD, which otherwise would have been impossible to independently discover. Why not just a button?), and then with the sound of a horse whinnying you are launched high into the air with a jet of white mist.      In this map, you are the horse spunk.      ...

       They say a picture is worth a thousand words. Look at the above picture. If the link isn't broken then you know what kind of map this is. SCMapDB page Author: Keen Date of release: 2008 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Horsecock 7 (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | May 2, 2026 | 3823 characters     We'll start out by addressing the elephant in the room, this map is centered around a giant penis that jacks players off into what I will describe as the realm of the toilets. There is a horse sound when this happens but nothing else to really suggest this penis belongs to a horse. You'd think such a map would be wacky and fun but the respawning enemies, especially the snipers, make it a chore to actually play.     Near spawn there is an indent in the wall where players can float up, my teammate and I do so right as the map starts and we get to a ledge where we are sniped to death. At some point around here, either by some...

        There are not a whole lot of options for Christmas themed Sven maps. Step into the shoes of Santa and drop presents (grenades) down the chimneys of the good children. SCMapDB page Authors: CubicVirtuoso Date of release: 2007 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Sveney Christmas (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | December 17, 2023 | 1918 characters      For a map made in two hours, this is a pretty complete idea. Players take grenades, fly around on a sleigh with train controls, and chuck the nades into 8 chimneys to complete the sequence. Each chimney is fairly easy to hit if you pull the sleigh up nice and close and take a couple throws to adjust aim. If you miss a bunch, don't worry, you can just fly your sleigh back to the cloud where you picked up your grenades.      The map has an effective aesthetic. The sleigh looks good, the cloud platform is perfectly functional, I think the street lamps on the cloud highlight...

      There are not a whole lot of options for Christmas themed Sven maps. Step into the shoes of Santa and drop presents (grenades) down the chimneys of the good children. SCMapDB page Authors: CubicVirtuoso Date of release: 2007 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Sveney Christmas (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | December 17, 2023 | 1642 characters      Well it's that time of year again, at least it was when I wrote this, and that means it's time for Christmas. This fun holiday map has us riding around in Saint Nick's little cart thing and delivering presents to the children, and by that I mean grenades. The map description says it was made in only two hours and the result is a very short and fun map.      When we were almost at the end of blowing these poor children to kingdom come my teammate suddenly realized that we weren't getting any score for this, I feel like that would have been a big improvement and give the map more ...

       Fight tons of chumtoads in this very short map. Watch fun cutscenes where scientists mess up (who could have seen that coming!), fight a bunch of chumtoads, kill a boss, and celebrate victory. SCMapDB page Author: the-middleman Date of release: 2014 Maps in package: 2 (includes another map we didn't play or review) Map review of Chubby Mess (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | July 23, 2023 | 1884 characters      Chubby Mess is a real short map that certainly had a vision. There's an opening cutscene that very naturally (if a little drawn-out) explains the situation: science did what science shouldn't, mixing big and many and chumtoads. The result is a chubby mess.      There are three phases to the map: first run from masses of snarks (chubbies) spawning in huge casecading numbers, then run back the way you came to destroy the mother chubby with explosives. The third part comes before both: the aforementioned very lo...

      Fight tons of chumtoads in this very short map. Watch fun cutscenes where scientists mess up (who could have seen that coming!), fight a bunch of chumtoads, kill a boss, and celebrate victory. SCMapDB page Author: the-middleman Date of release: 2014 Maps in package: 2 (includes another map we didn't play or review) Map review of Chubby Mess (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | July 23, 2023 | 1077 characters      The map starts on a lengthy and cute cutscene where we see scientists messing around with chumtoads. One thing leads to another and we are forced to flee to the other end of the map where we find weapons and armor. We get another quick cutscene before running through a rain of giant chumtoads, it is indeed a Chubby Mess.      The goal of the map is to run back to spawn and then kill the biggest chumtoad, which takes exactly all our explosives so that worked out well. It's short, sweet and incredibly cute and endeari...

       This is a variety map, walk through a teleporter to be dropped off in a fun room. There is an arena, control room, maze, armory, crusher, and a very saucy place. SCMapDB page Author: halo4life Date of release: 2006 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Choose (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | July 9, 2023 | 2752 characters      Choose is a real swiss army knife of a map. It reminds me of the reeeaaally old Garry's Mod construct map, where you just press buttons to spawn everything. This map really harkens back to that.      So, you've got a bunch of doors. There's an armory for restocking your ammo, an arena for pressing buttons which spawn horrible monsters to fight, an invisible maze for banging your head against your keyboard until blood pours of your ears, a "crusher room", a "pron" room, and a control room.      The armory gives you a bunch of the good shit. Tau, RPG, Gluon- the works. It's good, bec...

      This is a variety map, walk through a teleporter to be dropped off in a fun room. There is an arena, control room, maze, armory, crusher, and a very saucy place. SCMapDB page Author: halo4life Date of release: 2006 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Choose (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | July 9, 2023 | 1452 characters      The simply named Choose is a sort of variety map where players start in a room with teleporters to various attractions. We have a room labelled Crusher, OMG Free Pr0n, Control Room, Arena, Maze, and Armory. There was also a dancing gonome.      The Crusher room has some buttons that trigger traps to kill scientists. They kind of just run around and it can be tough to actually get them into the traps. There is also a conveyor that dumps scientists into a spike. The promise of free pornography is worth it and players should definitely check it out. The control room is a bit of gameplay to access a menu of...

       Hang out and wait in a lobby and amuse yourself with a giant sound system with lots of different music. This map is meant to be a waiting room so there isn't much else to do here. SCMapDB page Author: Sence Date of release: 2019 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chillplace v1337 (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | July 6, 2023 | 2054 characters      Chillplace v1337 is a reconfiguration of the ideas in Chillplace v2 for a more streamlined presentation. Gone is the island with the tiny buttons on a boombox, and here now is the day of a bizarre structure which controls music, and beautiful mountain scenery. Some nicely utilized models for mountains give the impression of displacement.      For those unaware, Chillplace is a hangout map where players can vibe to music. Kinda like a virtual club. To that end, I think Chillplace offers a decently sized venue with enough of a fun vibe to hang out with friends. I also think ...

      Hang out and wait in a lobby and amuse yourself with a giant sound system with lots of different music. This map is meant to be a waiting room so there isn't much else to do here. SCMapDB page Author: Sence Date of release: 2019 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chillplace v1337 (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | July 6, 2023 | 1509 characters      This is sort of a sequel to Chillplace v2 or maybe a remake. The goal is the same, as a sort of lobby or waiting room map. Besides pressing buttons on a massive sound system to play a staggering number of music tracks there is no gameplay. I noclipped around and saw nothing hidden either.      The scenery is pretty good looking though. We have some majestic mountains with incredibly stretched out textures. It looked pretty bad close up but it also gave the map a warped sense of scale that worked well with the scenery and dim blue lighting. There's also a chilling horrible monster...

      The only interactive feature of this map seems to be a big boombox that plays many sounds. The rest of the map is a tiny room that looks very interesting, the map is a lobby so there isn't all that much to do. SCMapDB page Author: Sence Date of release: 2013 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chillplace v2 (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | July 2, 2023 | 1924 characters      Chillplace V2! If there's a Chillplace V1, I don't know about it!      This map is a chill lobby area with an island of blue grass and a big mystical tree with light shining from within. There's a lot of fun effects on display, like liberal use of sprites to create fun glowing particles and flowers, or additive gradient brushes to create the light burst from within the tree. There's a custom model of a horrible, unchill mothman with a gaping lower jaw laying beneath the tree, likely dreaming of mercifully departing its hideous existence. A stereo plays...

      The only interactive feature of this map seems to be a big boombox that plays many sounds. The rest of the map is a tiny room that looks very interesting, the map is a lobby so there isn't all that much to do. SCMapDB page Author: Sence Date of release: 2013 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chillplace v2 (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | July 2, 2023 | 2197 characters      This map is supposed to be a waiting room between maps, and I think it accomplishes that. The map is entertaining enough for about five minutes but then it gets old.      The map itself is a really fantastic looking grassy green hill with a big well detailed tree in the middle. The hill slopes down rather sharply and ends in a black abyss, rock cliff walls surround us on the other side of the abyss. We can't drop down because there is an invisible wall keeping us on top of the hill. There are a lot of invisible walls, they become problematic around the ...

       Ride on a helicopter, sans Wagner, and shoot down at the enemies below. Occasionally enemy helicopters will appear but there is a rocket launcher on the map so they go down easy. SCMapDB page Author: Unknown Date of release: 2002 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chopper Ride (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | July 2, 2023 | 1898 characters      The Chopper Ride is a nonstop action map starring a brush helicopter and a donut of desert around a mountain full of respawning HECU. If that sounds awesome to you, you're in for a treat.      I think the Chopper Ride is truly made for people who like Michael Bay movies and want to play that feeling. Grab a bunch of weapons, ride around on an invincible helicopter raining hell down on, uh, enemy combatants forever. One part of the desert donut has a respawning apache so your helicopter can fight another helicopter like a mirror fight. There's not very much to it, outside of t...

      Ride on a helicopter, sans Wagner, and shoot down at the enemies below. Occasionally enemy helicopters will appear but there is a rocket launcher on the map so they go down easy. SCMapDB page Author: Unknown Date of release: 2002 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chopper Ride (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | July 2, 2023 | 1522 characters      This is a very simple but fun horde map where players get to fly a helicopter on a fixed route around a big arena filled with human grunts and sometimes apaches. Players spawn up top on a cliff and there is a path around the center of the map in a big donut where all the enemies are, opposite player spawn is another cliff we can access the chopper.      The map has some ok weapons, in spawn we get a crossbow, rocket launcher, underbarrel grenades (which come with an M16), and an uzi. The chopper starts here but it can be controlled like any other func_vehicle so any player can drive...

       What else is there to say? We can now play chess in a Sven Co-op map. Of course the rules are not enforced so it's mostly anarchy. But still, pretty cool stuff! SCMapDB page Author: Streamfox Date of release: 2015 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chess (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | July 1, 2023 | 2656 characters      This is a map which facilitates the honorable playing of chess in Sven Co-op. I say honorable, because this really allows for wild-west antics if your players don't adhere to the rules of chess.      There's a giant chess board, controls for each player, and controls for the game in general. There's also some screens which players can cycle through to review the rules of chess, in case they don't know how to play. Which it's a very novel concept, I don't recommend learning chess by playing it in this map.      Players press a button to join the game, which did something I'm sure. Wal...

      What else is there to say? We can now play chess in a Sven Co-op map. Of course the rules are not enforced so it's mostly anarchy. But still, pretty cool stuff! SCMapDB page Author: Streamfox Date of release: 2015 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chess (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | July 1, 2023 | 1492 characters      Chess is chess! The whole map is a big room with a big chessboard in the center with helpful tips on the walls. I was very very impressed by the map until we found out that the rules are all on the honor system. We could move every piece whereever we want, even outside of the game. Then I dropped down to very impressed by this map, it is still functional chess after all.      One big issue I find is that it is actually pretty hard to put pieces down where we want them. My first piece went askew and sometimes the map just refuses to place a piece. Joining the game doesn't assign us pieces, we can access ea...

       Ride off into the perpetual sunset with some chill tunes. There is no time limit, no objectives, no secrets, or any goals other than chilling out.  SCMapDB page Author: Gruntzz Date of release: 2022 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chill Ride (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | July 1, 2023 | 2198 characters      Chill Ride is what it says on the tin: a chill track, some rides, and a track to ride them upon with great chill.      There's not much to say about this map so I'll make it brief: there's a track with very little detail on it, and cars that are very simple in shape. But those aren't what matters. No, the beauty of the map is in the chill beat, the funky skybox (which is very funky, btw), the fun way the cars just bumpercars around if they crash, and the chill shape of the track which lends to relaxed cruising.      Upon deciding we had seen most of what the map has to offer, we experimen...

      Ride off into the perpetual sunset with some chill tunes. There is no time limit, no objectives, no secrets, or any goals other than chilling out.  SCMapDB page Author: Gruntzz Date of release: 2022 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Chill Ride (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | July 1, 2023 | 2062 characters      This is indeed a very chill map. It's a big circular track with a ton of cars that players can drive around in a big loop. The skybox is a delightful outrun style sun and there is some chill synthwave in the background. The track and car color is all brown which is a confusing contrast to the bright sky.      My teammate decided to splatter me so we drove head on and I disintegrated at the molecular level on contact. We did this a few more times with the same result before we eventually both died from the impact. I don't know how the impact on func_vehicle works so be careful of the lucky few with splatter pow...