Sven Co-op Map Reviews

       I don't really know what secrets I was supposed to find, but this map can sure be a place. Hallways, doors that aren't doors but breakable walls instead, and some other random stuff can all be found here. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2003 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Punk Secret Place (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | July 28, 2022 | 4393 characters     What can I say? Robootto does it again. Act I.      Punk Secret Place is a map about the secret place and the punks who find it. You'd need to be a punk, you see, for only punks take the time it takes to break through the breakable doors which permeate the first act of this 5-act play. Breakable doors, at least 100 of them I'm sure, all lead up to a boss door or sorts. There is a glass security door which takes, gosh, just so much to destroy. It's in a pretty cramped area, and bless robootto he gives an area up near spawn and the ammo respawne...

      I don't really know what secrets I was supposed to find, but this map can sure be a place. Hallways, doors that aren't doors but breakable walls instead, and some other random stuff can all be found here. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2003 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Punk Secret Place (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | July 28, 2022 | 4554 characters      This map will crash your game. I'm somewhat spoiling the punchline, but I think this is very important to know up front. Falling into the green goo at the end of the map will crash the game with a "Sv_HullPointContent: bad node number". Knowing what I do about the author, Robootto, I think this is entirely intentional. Edit 8/8/2022: Shortly after this review the crash was fixed, the crash was not intentional.      The map starts off strong with a very nice equipment room, but the rest of the map is a hallway. There are a few branches to this h...

       This map is a zoo (not to be confused with the other zoo map made by Icewold) condensed down into a hallway. There are only eight exhibits but the whole thing is interactive. SCMapDB page Author: Killer99 Date of final release: 1999 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Zoo (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | July 8, 2022 | 1776 characters      Zoo is a map that consists of a small corridor with glass cages displaying the various wildlife of Xen angrily rocking against their confines. After breaking a grate, the xenians escape, and the player must navigate a short rising water puzzle and a vent to get to a snark kill box.      I guess this is a troll map. Due to Sven's enhanced enemies, the alien grunts, zombies, and vortigaunts in the early map are far more chaotic than the map was originally balanced for, so just getting to the puzzle is a rough chore. They endlessly respawn too. Things are even more dire if alien grunt...

      This map is a zoo (not to be confused with the other zoo map made by Icewold) condensed down into a hallway. There are only eight exhibits but the whole thing is interactive. SCMapDB page Author: Killer99 Date of final release: 1999 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Zoo (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | July 8, 2022 | 1438 characters      The map is a simple hallway with windows on either side. All sorts of xen creatures spawn infinitely inside these rooms behind glass. At the far end is a grate on the floor, after breaking it (or in my case, standing on it), jump down into the hole which will break the glass on the zoo animals. They start spawning in immediately and don't really stop, players only start with basic pistol and 17 rounds and crowbar. My teammate and I had to cheat to make it back to the hole alive.      The hole leads to an underground water filled tunnel, the end of which leads to a room with a grate on the...

       The map description simply reads "The average sven player cannot beat this." The map is a room with a box and a button, what mysteries does this map hold? SCMapDB page Author: GAMESABA Date of final release: 2008 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Area 491 (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | June 5, 2022 | 1754 characters      Area 491 is a map that I don't understand, but can beat. You begin in a room with a box and a button. If you press the button you will explode, but if you break the box and then press the button you will not explode and you will complete the map. The box takes quite a few hits to destroy, but with teamwork it doesn't have to take long.      The map itself is pretty boring looking. Little effort is put into beautification, and if I had to describe the aesthetic it would be "debug room". The button gives no indication that it will explode, I'm guessing for troll reasons, and the box which must be d...

      The map description simply reads " The average sven player cannot beat this." The map is a room with a box and a button, what mysteries does this map hold? SCMapDB page Author: GAMESABA Date of final release: 2008 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Area 491 (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | June 5, 2022 | 1591 characters      This is a Japanese troll map consisting of a big room with a button on one wall and a box in a corner. There is some stuff on the wall but that's all texture, none of it does anything. Running to the button will trigger an explosion that will kill you instantly and a message in Japanese (romanji) that my teammate is hard at work Google translating as I write this. It means something like "hey pretty good, it takes guts" if Google translate is any good.      The secret to beating the map is destroying the box, which has a ton of health, and that will stop the explosions. When the explosions are off you ...

      There is something about this map that is not seen in screenshots or mentioned in the map description on Sven Co-op map database. That is the fact that there is some sort of white filter over the map, except underwater. Everything is white unless you are underwater. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Megaoxean (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | February 6, 2022 | 3425 characters      If you were to tie a blindfold on me, splash milk in my face, and then hit me as hard as you can in my temple with a baseball bat, I would likely go about the next several moments feeling very similarly to how this map is likely to make you feel.      I'd love to comment on brushwork, textures, all that, except there's a problem with this map: the entire thing is submerged in thick, white fog which obscures everything more than an inch from your face unless you're underwater. The map uti...

      There is something about this map that is not seen in screenshots or mentioned in the map description on Sven Co-op map database. That is the fact that there is some sort of white filter over the map, except underwater. Everything is white unless you are underwater. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Megaoxean (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | February 6, 2022 | 1661 characters      This map has some weird filter on it where all you see is white unless you are underwater. There is a tube in spawn that you can see somehow. Jump down the tube, fall into the megaoxean, fight robogrunts with pistol and crowbar and maybe the rocket launcher in the whited out spawn room. If you aren't underwater, what you see is white.      I played with a friend, he was white, I got to the room under the oxean, it was white. I noclipped through the level and jumped around a couple areas, ...

      If you can't tell from the above picture, this map is supposed to be an Olympic ski jump. The ski jump doesn't work and can actually trap players in it. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2003 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Messuhalli (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | February 6, 2022 | 1367 characters      Robootto is pretty good at making me feel like an idiot for playing his stuff. This map is a prime example of this.      This map consists of one large room, a (seemingly?) impenetrable glass room on a mezzanine, a big vat of inconspicuous white substance, and a slide from a platform into said vat. Climbing up a ladder gets the player onto the platform, and then jumping onto the slide gets you trapped inside of it because the top surface of the slide is intangible. The only way out is death. I was certain, the moment I saw this map, that the slide would be fucky in a way I wouldn't predict. I was r...

      If you can't tell from the above picture, this map is supposed to be an Olympic ski jump. The ski jump doesn't work and can actually trap players in it. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2003 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Messuhalli (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | February 6, 2022 | 1457 characters      The map description for this map reads 'the snow is broken'. This is not quite true, the snow is intangible and that is not something done on accident. Perhaps the author couldn't make slippery snow and decided to just phase it out of existence. The result is that players will fall into a box they can not get out of. I suffered this fate and had to commit suicide to get out of it, my teammate fell into this trap later as well and I took the chance to laugh at his misfortune.      The whole map is one big room. There is a platform on one end of the room with the 'broken' ice slide and a cup of milk a...

       Jump Fall is a map with one spot where you jump and then fall. The rest of the map is a somewhat broken jumble of things. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Jump Fall (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | January 15, 2022 | 1583 characters      I don't even know what to say about Robootto's maps anymore. They just unfold and unfold and unfold just enough for you to believe there's going to be a light at the end of the tunnel, but it's always just confusion and disappointment.      This map is no different.      After a series of confusing events whose events seem untied to one another, mostly involving finding out which spawn room you appeared in at different ends of the map, other times involving finding hordes of enemies. Sometimes you find big troves of ammo.      After aimlessly wandering there's nothing much left to this map. I r...

      Jump Fall is a map with one spot where you jump and then fall. The rest of the map is a somewhat broken jumble of things. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Jump Fall (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | January 15, 2022 | 3215 characters      Whenever I play maps made by Robootto I get one of two distinct feelings. One feeling is 'this is absolute garbage' and the other feeling, which this map gave me, is 'this map is made to piss me off'.      I downloaded the Big Robootto map pack which means I got not only this map, but two earlier versions of this map as well. So I got to see behind the curtain of this map, just a bit. There is a lot going on, there are a lot of rooms, and I have no clue how to get to any of them.      The map starts in one of two places, either a room with a load of weapons, a glass plug in the floor, a glass window, and a door. Or ...

       This map is tiny. The map description reads: "Try fitting a populated server in this.." which is pretty funny to imagine. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2004 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Cybertech Elevator (originally posted on SCMapDB) by dunkelschwamm | December 16, 2021 | 3055 characters      Robootto does it again with another proof of concept map that feels baffling and hostile to the players without presuming that context. Robootto's maps get in fast, make a statement, and stop being interesting before the headscratching stops. Cybertech elevator is no different.      The map starts in a very cramped security room with cybertextures vomited onto the walls. Some of them are decent looking, and there's some fun attempts at detail in some pipes/cables which are utterly in the way of where a person would need to stand to press a button, making them impractical and the scenery somewhat surreal or absurd ...

      This map is tiny. The map description reads: " Try fitting a populated server in this.." which is pretty funny to imagine. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2004 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Cybertech Elevator (originally posted on SCMapDB) by GrandmasterJ | December 16, 2021 | 1209 characters      When I first spawned in I liked what I saw. The room was a little cramped but I thought the room was well put together. That is the end of the nice things I have to say about this map.      There are two doors to the elevator, one goes straight up and the other splits down the middle and slides to the sides. All three moving parts operate independently of each other and just start opening and closing a lot while we are trying to get into the cramped elevator. The elevator started going up in th middle of our attempts at navigating the door, it took a very long time for it to come back down. Then we had to do some crouch...

       This is a map that has nothing to do with the title. The map description is candid about the fact that the rooms are textureless, the hallways are pitch black, and there are a ton of monsters. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Fun Fun Fun (originally posted on SCMapDB)  by dunkelschwamm | December 12, 2021 | 942 characters     Fun fun fun is another Robooto map that exists to fulfill a simple niche in things Sven Co-op maps technically can do but never would have if Robooto hadn't made them. A large, featureless room is full of weapon pickups and constantly alien military. Surrounding rooms are full of darkness. Maneuver around and kill the enemies. To what end? To no end. It is endless. Endless fun?      Well, frankly I found the map tedious after a few minutes. If you're looking for a slaughter map that offers literally absolutely nothing but the tedium of endlessly slaugh...

      This is a map that has nothing to do with the title. The map description is candid about the fact that the rooms are textureless, the hallways are pitch black, and there are a ton of monsters. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Fun Fun Fun (originally posted on SCMapDB)  by GrandmasterJ | December 12, 2021 | 816 characters      This map is a large well lit room filled with what looks like a handful of each alien enemy with a large very dark hallway wrapped around it that ends in a ramp to a platform that overlooks the room. From this platform I can see a hole in the ceiling that is so far up I will never be able to get in there without cheats. From screenshots I can see weapons in there. Down here I don't have weapons, I have a pistol and 17 bullets.      I feel like this map is a slap in the face. Pros: Cons: absolute terrible design in every category players are taunted with...

       Long hallways with no branching paths are not labyrinths. This map is a long hallway with no branching paths. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Crazy Labyrinth (originally posted on SCMapDB)  by dunkelschwamm | December 12, 2021 | 2255 characters      The incredible thing about Robooto's body of work is that you never know what kind of madness it will lay upon your lap next. You're never entirely sure to what extent the map is a joke at the player's expense at to what extent it is actually just Robooto's boredom scouring Goldsrc for extreme anti-gameplay ideas and bringing them into existence just to make the world a little more chaotic.      Crazy Labyrinth is a long hallway winding back and forth, back and forth, mostly in the dark, utterly linearly, until it ends at a tiny brushwork award. The hallway is mostly homogenous all the way through. Any seeming offshoot is ...

      Long hallways with no branching paths are not labyrinths. This map is a long hallway with no branching paths. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of Crazy Labyrinth (originally posted on SCMapDB)  by GrandmasterJ | December 12, 2021 | 1154 characters      I can't really be mad when the map description tells me exactly what the level is. It is a long hallway that has a vaguely interesting crystal thing at the end and the map is over. What the description doesn't say is that players are spawned so that they fall to their deaths unless they swim in a sliver of water in the middle. I thought that gimmick was kinda cool after I got what I was supposed to do. But then there is a door with entirely too much health. My teammate gave up trying to break it and looked for alternatives. I cheated and gave myself an egon gun to try. I eventually broke halfway through the ammo.      It's got a ...

       The map description for this reads: "This is the fun map. but its too darky from the room." The first half of that description is a lie but the second half is true. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of dda (originally posted on SCMapDB)  by dunkelschwamm | December 11, 2021 | 1951 characters      There are many things which are enhanced by the dark. A nap is better in the dark. Lovemaking is often regarded as more romantic and classy in the dark. Watching a film in the dark.      Fighting respawning bullsquids is bullshit in the dark. I mean, it could be fine- if you had the appropriate armaments for dealing with respawning bullsquids in the dark (maybe a shotgun and an M16, plenty more ammo, or maybe instead uzis? Something, anything) but the map supplies the player with only a glock with a tiny helping of bullets.      Rushing through the map will eventual...

      The map description for this reads: " This is the fun map. but its too darky from the room." The first half of that description is a lie but the second half is true. SCMapDB page Author: Robootto Date of final release: 2005 Maps in package: 1 Map review of dda (originally posted on SCMapDB)  by GrandmasterJ | December 11, 2021 | 860 characters      The map description reads "Its a fun map". This is a lie, this is not a fun map.      The map is a big unlit donut shaped hallway with a room in the center. The dark hallway is full of respawning bullsquids, the room is full of vortigaunts. You spawn only with a pistol and the default 17 rounds and there is no ammo that I could find. You spawn in the hallway with the respawning bullsquids.      There are parts of this map I did not get to, I can see the secrets tag and the screenshots, but I am not really interested in playing any further.      It is not a f...