Big Penis - GrandmasterJ

 

    There really isn't any large male genitalia in this map. There is a small pixelated depiction of that but it's not the same. Besides that, hang out on a sandy island and hang out in the dance tent or hot tub.

Edit: 2/20/2023: Shortly after we wrote our reviews, this map was removed from the database. The reason cited was the map's inclusion, in its entirety, in another map (Secret Lounge). Also the author credit is wrong. This review will be kept for posterity, including the incorrect author credit and broken link to a map page that no longer exists. 

SCMapDB page

Author: Boxes

Date of release: Unknown

Maps in package: 1

Map review of Big Penis

(originally posted on SCMapDB)

by GrandmasterJ | February 11, 2023 | 1714 characters

    For everybody looking for a big penis in this map, sorry to break the news like this, but there isn't any. The map description does warn of a porn room but it's weird old man penis. Anyway, the whole map is an island and there is a tent, camp fire, hot tub, and a wooden box that turns out to be an outhouse. There are like three trees and there there is space to run around in the waist high water surrounding the island.

    The map is a good hang out map with a couple of fun details. Turn the bubbles on and off in the hot tub or turn the stereo on in the tent. Somewhere in the water is a gib, what looks like a leg to me, picking this up opens the door to the outhouse and sitting on the pot will teleport players to the aforementioned porn room. It's Lazy Town pornography with ghastly photoshops of the old puppet mayor on some old man on little girl action. As far as Sven porn goes this is a serious contender for worst of all time.

    There was also a friendly robo grunt, we killed him which took forever but nothing happened when he died. There are no weapons on the map nor are there any breakable objects besides the robo grunt we probably weren't meant to kill.

    The map was fairly small overall but it can be fun for people to hang out in. There are a couple of fun spots with interactivity and a gross spectacle to ogle. It does get old fast though and there is no game end.

Pros:

  • some fun interactive bits

Cons:

  • Why can't porn in Sven maps be good?
  • gets old fast
Score: 5 / 10

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